First time round
by Scarlet137
Summary: called this because it is my first fanfic, I do not own Inuyasha or it's characters where naraku is defeated; kikyo tells us what she really thinks and kagome makes a decision Kag/Inu pairing; Mir/San hinted; rating just to be safe


**Ok, I'm not sure how to do this but as an author's note; I DO NOT own Inuyasha, it's characters or any of the rights associated with the creation or continuation of this anime or it's named associates. **

**I think that covers everything so this is my first story up on this site so please comment; flames are appreciated to help me improve so give me your best shot :D  
**

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In the final battle against Naraku it had not been Inuyasha who had dealt the final crushing blow; at least he had not been alone. Kikyo and Kagome, with their sacred arrows, had pierced the flesh where Naraku's heart should have been before the wind scar had even left tessaiga. As the wind scar hit a piercing scream echoed from the youkai whom, for three years, they had been trying to vanquish, and a sudden wind picked up dragging the party towards the decaying monstrosity that was Naraku.

"DIE INUYASHA!" and with one mutilated arm Naraku lunged for the hanyou yet the strike did not land. Out of the corner of his eye he saw the miko fall, but it was not Kagome as he thought it had been, but Kikyo. She did not scream, she made no sound at all, only looked upon the doomed youkai with, what was that in her eye, was it triumph? With the force of a small bomb the group of friends were thrown backwards and the youkai was no more.

Picking himself up Inuyasha looked around to see where his friends were, there was Miroku helping Sango to her feet, examining the hand where the wind tunnel had once been, he turned beaming to the young demon slayer embracing her tightly, Shippo jumped up onto Kirara, Inuyasha let out a sigh, they were safe but where was … Turning once more he found her kneeling next to the woman she so desperately hated. Kagome had propped Kikyo's head on her lap and was trying to get the older miko to take a drink.

"Kikyo, please, let me help you." Inuyasha could smell her tears. He saw Kikyo reach up and stroke Kagome's cheek.

"There is no helping me anymore child." Her voice was weak, delicate as glass as she stared up at her reincarnation. "Where is Inuyasha?"

"I'm here Kikyo." He too knelt beside her.

"I'll leave you to it." Kagome bowed as deeply as she could, having placed Kikyo's head on her jacket. Walking over to Sango, Miroku and Shippo, the young kitsune jumped into her arms.

"Are you all alright?" She looked at each of her friends in turn.

"A few bumps and bruises but nothing serious lady Kagome, and look…" he removed the beads from his wrist. Kagome coward slightly as he removed the sleeve of fabric. She looked up at his hand … the wind tunnel was gone! She smiled and hugged her friend, but then she saw Sango's face; Naraku's death had not healed all the pains of the group.

"I need to… find Gohaku." The unshed tears were glistening in her eyes.

"We'll help you Sango… you don't need to do this alone."

"Thank you Miroku." As the tears began to slide down her face Miroku's arms went around her shoulders pulling her to him. Turning from the scene Kagome's eyes fell once more upon Inuyasha and Kikyo.

As he stared down at Kikyo he realised that this would be the last time that he looked upon her, at least as Kikyo. He wasn't sorry; she was finally going to be allowed to rest.

"You shouldn't be here Inuyasha." He looked down at her slightly confused, he grinned attempting to hide both his sadness and his confusion.

"This isn't where you tell me I should be in the same situation as Naraku, or still stuck to that tree is it?" she laughed slightly but it died quickly on her lips as she gazed up at him seriously.

"You should be with _her. _You love her, I know it, your friends know it, you know it but you refuse to admit it. You have the Shikon no tama Inuyasha; you can have anything that you want. Don't let your brother control your decision. You don't need to be a full demon to have everything and you don't need to be a human either. She loves you just as you are, and that will never change. I was selfish when I made you promise…" She coughed suddenly, a cough that shook her entire being; she was running out of time.

"Kikyo, I…"

"Let me finish Inuyasha". She paused taking a deep, rattling breath. "I was selfish, Inuyasha, I was selfish for what I asked you all those years ago and I was selfish when I asked you to die for me. I'm sorry Inuyasha. I gave up, don't do the same as what I did, don't…"He heard her gasp from where she lay and looking into her eyes, he saw them grow cold and she was gone.

Closing his eyes he bowed his head in silent prayer. He did not cry, he couldn't; not anymore. Placing his arms under her, he lifted her, turning to his friends. Looking at each of them in turn he saw a small smile flicker across Kagome's face as she stared into space. Closing her eyes she cast her face down to the earth and then back to the hanyou standing not twenty paces from where she was. Nodding slightly to him she watched as he strode off towards Kaede's village. It would not be for quite some time, but she would tell him eventually what it was she had been smiling at.

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She had witnessed Kikyo's final moment she had seen the hanyou's ears go to his head, she knew he was sad, but he did not cry. She watched as he picked up the body but then she had seen it. The small bluish, white orb floating above Kikyo, it was one of the souls that had been within her, keeping her alive. Kagome stared at it confused, why had it not moved on? It came towards her and as it did; it took shape. She smiled slightly in realisation. Standing before her was Kikyo.

"Don't let him go Kagome. Thank you for what you did, you saved his life… and my soul." And with that the bluish light of her spirit returned to the place from where she came, from within Kagome.

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As she watched Inuyasha's receding back she knew that she would have to make a decision. She had a lot to think about but right now she had to help her friends. There was more than one past that needed to be put to rest.

"He's here. Sango I found him!" It was not with joy that Miroku called out, Kagome knew from the tone of his voice that he would have given anything to avoid telling her that her brother's body was among the fallen, even though they knew that he would be. Walking over to the young monk Kagome slid to her knees as she watched Sango collapse, all attempts to hide her sadness gone, as sobs raked her body.

"I'm sorry Gohaku, I'm so sorry".

"There was nothing you could do Sango. He's at peace." Kagome placed a hand on her friends back as she watched Miroku say prayers for the boy's soul. "Let's take him home". Sango sat up and hugged her friend as her sobs slowly resided. She nodded to Kagome. Taking the demon slayer by the arm Kagome pulled her to her feet, as Miroku lifted the young boy.

"We'll take him to Kaede's village to prepare him and then if you would permit Lady Kagome I will go with Sango back to the Demon Slayer's village." Nodding to Miroku she supported Sango as they all turned and made their way back to Kaede's village.

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It had been almost a week since they had defeated Naraku. Standing in the clearing where they had waged their final battle Kagome stared at the place where Kikyo had fallen. They had finally laid the young woman to rest and Kagome was once again whole. She had not seen Inuyasha since Kikyo's burial almost three days ago; strangely she did not expect to see him either. Fingering the chain that was around her neck she pulled the jewel from beneath her blouse. It glowed pale pink as it lay, whole in her hand. What was she going to do? She knew that she would have to go home, but what about the home she had made here, what about her friends, her family, she loved her family, but she loved the people in this feudal era as well. She had to go home, she needed to speak to her mum, she knew that he would need the jewel to make his wish but she had to do this even if it was to be for the last time. Turning on her heel she made her way back to Kaede's hut but not before she cast one more grateful look to clearing.

"Ah lady Kagome it is good to see you."

"Miroku, Sango!" She rushed to hug her friend. "Oh I'm so glad your back. Are you alright?" She turned to Sango.

"I'm… I'll be fine Kagome. I'm… well, I miss him, but he's at peace." She saw Miroku's arm snake around Sango's waist as she spoke, but he wasn't being his usual perverted self, it was to comfort her.

"I'm glad you're both alright. I'm glad you're back too; I need to go home at least for a couple of days. I'll be back though, but I need you to watch Shippo, Kaede has gone to the next village with medicinal herbs. Will you be alright without me?"

"Of course lady Kagome. We'll be alright." Kagome witnessed the light squeeze that Miroku gave Sango as she went for her bag. "But what should we say to Inuyasha? He is bound to wonder where you have gone."

"Just tell him… Tell him that I'll see him soon ok?" She turned and looked at her friends.

"Of course."

And with that she hugged each of them, pulled her bag onto her back and left.

Walking back into the hut he knew that Sango and Miroku were back and that the brat was in there with them, there was something missing though. Where was the apple blossom and vanilla? He walked into the hut and looked around, her bag was gone. Good Kami NO!

"WHERE IS SHE?" He was panicking, he knew it and he didn't care, she was gone!

"She went home Inuyasha, she said…" but he was gone. He knew it was already too late her scent had almost disappeared completely as he tore towards the well. He swung himself over the edge the moment that he got there but he knew that it was hopeless; the well wouldn't let him through. The tears were blinding him as he hit the dirt again and again. It wasn't until he felt someone grab his wrists that he was stopped from jumping into the well.

"Inuyasha stop!"

"LET ME GO! I NEED TO GET THROUGH! I NEED TO! I NEED TO…" He strained against Miroku's grip.

"You haven't lost her Inuyasha, not yet. She'll… Inuyasha listen to me!" He gripped the hanyou tighter as he tried to get back into the well. "She will be back Inuyasha, she still has the jewel, she _will_ come back!" And with that the young hanyou collapsed against the monk. Gripping him around his waist Miroku hoisted him onto Kirara before pulling himself up on to her. He looked down at the young man in front of him and then at the well. "Hurry back Kagome." And with that Kirara took off taking them home.

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_I_n the future, Kagome sat with her mother and grandfather and brother in the kitchen of their home. As she stared around at the granite tabletops and the stove, along with all the other things in the house, she knew that there was something missing, but at the same time there wasn't.

"Mum can we talk?"

"Sure sweetie, what's up?" She saw Kagome cast her grandfather and Sota an uneasy look. "Let's go upstairs shall we and I'll draw you a bath".

"Thanks mum." They smiled at each other.

Up in the bathroom Kagome watched her mother run the warm water.

"So what's bothering you dear?"

"I don't know what to do." Her mother cocked an eyebrow at her. "I mean, I know that home is here, but I also feel that I have a home in the Feudal era. But if I purify the jewel and he wishes to become a full demon then I'll never be able to go back to them I'll never be able to be with…" She wanted to say him, but she knew what would happen, she'd burst into tears, she bit her bottom lip, "them again."

"Baby, I can't tell you what to do. I want you to be happy." Her mother reached out and stroked her cheek. "I know how you feel about Inuyasha, I know how you've always felt about him, the question is does he know how you feel about him? You can't stop change baby, it's one of the two things in life that are certain. But if you want something badly enough you'll fight for it no matter what's thrown at you, no matter what changes come your way. Some may be good, some may be bad, but no matter what, you have to fight and you have to give those around you the opportunity to fight for what it is that they want, even if what you want and what they want doesn't match up." Tears glistened in Kagome's eyes as her mother spoke, she knew what she was saying, that she had to do her best to help her friend, but if what he wanted didn't include her, then she would have to roll with the change and do what she needed to do.

"Thanks, I love you mum." And she hugged her mother.

"I love you sweetheart." Her mother wiped a tear from her own face. Clearing her throat she released her daughter. "Have your bath and then get some sleep I think you're going to need it ok." "Ok mum." Her mother left closing the door and with that Kagome stripped off and sank into the wonderfully warm water.

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It had been three days since Kagome had left and Inuyasha hadn't eaten or slept since he discovered she had left. Each of them, Sango, Miroku, Shippo, even Kaede had tried their damndest to get him to talk to them but he remained silent and he hadn't budged an inch from the doorway. They noticed him falling into sleep as the sun passed over head, Miroku sighed as he saw his friend's head sway slightly onto his shoulder. But then his ears started to twitch and his nose was in the air, before anyone had time to breath he was gone from their sight in a blur of red. They all turned to face one another:

"Kagome." And the three friends tore after Inuyasha leaving Kaede sitting shaking her head, a knowing smile playing on her lips.

He raced the wind as he ran towards the well. She was back, she had to be, the scent that was so uniquely hers still played on his nose as he ran. Bursting through the trees it was only then that he believed what his senses were telling him. Sitting up on the edge of the well she dragged the rucksack over the lip and it landed heavily on the grass as she stood. She hadn't seen him.

"KAGOME!" He bellowed. When he reached her he grabbed her arms and slipped, almost dragging her down with him. She grabbed his shoulders as he fell. Pulling himself up, she noticed the dark circles under his eyes.

"Inuyasha?"

He pulled her into a hug, his arms circling her waist and neck.

"I missed you Kagome". She turned her head into his neck and relaxed into the embrace. Her hands came to rest on his back as he pulled her closer.

"I missed you too Inuyasha". She nuzzled into his soft mane of white hair. She could have stayed there forever but someone else was calling her name, incessantly.

"Kagome, Kagome, Kagome!" She looked up from Inuyasha's shoulder. Bouncing towards her was Shippo, closely followed by Miroku, Sango and Kirara. As they approached she felt his embrace tighten, she smiled slightly to herself as she leaned back into him.

"I'm not going anywhere, not yet anyway." And with that she gently removed herself from his grasp. Looking into his molten amber eyes she smiled her small smile and spun round just in time to catch the kitsune that flew into her arms. "Hey there!"

"Lady Kagome you have returned!" She looked up Miroku and Sango.

"Of course I have, I said I would". Shippo turned to Inuyasha.

"See we told you so!" Kagome stood up and looked at the Inu-hanyou questioningly. "He wasn't convinced when we told him that you would be back, he hasn't eaten or slept since you left. He thought that you'd left him Kagome". Much to the surprise of everyone standing the kitsune remained unharmed and all Inuyasha did was look down. He didn't have the strength to do anything else. Kagome put the kitsune down and turned to face Inuyasha.

"Is that true?" He didn't answer her and he didn't look up. She smiled softly and raised her hand to his chin and gently forced him to look at her. "Is - that - true?" He looked up at her. He didn't have to say anything, his eyes said everything. "I told you I would never leave you, that I would stick by you no matter what… why would you doubt that?"

"Kagome… I… Kikyo, she…" She smiled sadly at him. "I…" He looked at the others.

"We can talk about this later ok." He looked at her again; the sadness in his molten gaze was like an arrow through her heart. Taking his hand they all turned and walked back to Kaede's hut.

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It was late that night when she woke up. Staring around the hut she noticed that he was missing. Moving out of her sleeping bag she walked to the doorway pushing aside the straw curtain. As the moon bathed her in its soft glow she turned to look up at the tree that stood across from Kaede's hut, up in the lower bows sat Inuyasha, his silver hair shimmering in the light. She walked over to the tree and looked upwards once more.

"Inuyasha, will you come down here please?" He dropped down so lightly he could have been a ghost. While they stared at one another, Kagome reached into her shirt and pulled out the jewel. "This is yours." And taking his hand she placed the jewel into his palm.

"Kagome, no! I can't take this." He tried desperately to give it back to her but she refused to take it back. "Please," He was pleading with her trying desperately to put the jewel back into her closed fist. "Don't do this! Take it back!" Tears began to fall down his cheeks, as she watched she felt the tears coming to her own eyes, she had to do this, she had to see. "GOD DAMN IT KAGOME!" The jewel hit the dirt as he grabbed her fists. "I don't want it, I don't want that life, I don't want to be like him, I don't want to give up. I don't want to lose you! I… I love you Kagome." She looked up at him, at the tears sliding down his cheeks, and she smiled at him.

"I love you too Inuyasha, I always have". Her hands relaxed in his and he pulled her into a tight hug. Looking down into her dark brown eyes, he slowly lowered his head and kissed her, gently on the lips. When he pulled away, he stared at her as though he couldn't quite believe that she was still there, still with him.

"Kagome..." "Inuyasha," she stopped him, "Don't change for anyone else, change for no one but yourself, but know this, I love you… Just as you are." With a smile on his lips he kissed her again and as he held her, he knew that this time he wasn't going to let go.


End file.
